2.png)
The season of Lent is something that had to grow on me and take its own shape and form in my life. For many years, my preparation for Lent was not much more than thinking about what I could seriously commit to giving up for 30 days and that was usually some type of food, as in, “OK, I'm giving up chocolate for Lent.” One year, I gave up cuss words for Lent. I’m not sure how much I really got out of the Lenten spiritual practice at that level of thinking because it felt pretty superficial. I didn’t think I was really making that much of a sacrifice, no matter what I chose to give up; nothing seemed to be anywhere close to the level of what Jesus went through in the wilderness. If the Lenten season is a time for prayer, fasting, and almsgiving in preparation for Easter, I already had to pray to make it through every week of the year, no matter what stage of my adult life I was in. I made charitable donations throughout the year, so it felt silly and self-serving to say that I was going to focus on that for Lent. And for me, fasting ends up feeling more like a weight-loss benefit than a spiritual discipline. I remember once, many years ago when I still lived in Altadena, when our pastor challenged us to a specific type of dietary fast. What I appreciated most about that fast was that I lost 10 pounds. It felt like I was accomplishing something by a) not eating anything else! and b) being obedient to our pastor’s challenge. Looking back, though, I don’t remember gaining any sense of spiritual enlightenment or breakthrough in preparation for Easter. Easter was always the goal, anyway.
What made a difference for me was a Lenten season a few years ago, when I casting about for something more meaningful, and it occurred to me that I could give up fear for Lent. That was a big one for me because of my work as an immigration attorney, where there is always something to be apprehensive about no matter who sits in the White House – not to mention that I live in this country as a Black woman. Giving up fear was, and still is, a huge and meaningful challenge for me because it requires that I really focus on walking by faith and not by sight, remembering that perfect love casts out fear, being mindful that Jesus warned us that we would have troubles in this life but that we should still be of good cheer because he had already overcome the world. I’m more focused and mindful that God has not given us a spirit of fear but of power and love and a sound mind.
So this Lenten season, I am giving up fear once again. And once again, that’s a big challenge. The current president appears to be working without any safety net, and those who serve him don’t have enough guardrails. Truth is so easily disregarded in favor of divisive political rhetoric. Anti-immigrant rhetoric has ramped up again, not just in the US, and threatens so many innocent people who just want to have a better life, earn a decent living, and live free from fear of their governments, gangs, or cartels. A politician has called for a federal pardon of the police officer who murdered George Floyd; the January 6 insurrectionists have been pardoned; and I have concerns for my son and grandsons. I still wrestle with a sense of income insecurity, and my gratitude for every birthday is mixed with awareness of my own mortality, particularly as a cancer survivor. And these things are just the tip of the iceberg. So giving up fear for Lent is a big thing for me, but spiritually do I feel it? You bet.
Peggy Bristol is a DSF Board member and has practiced immigration law in the Bay Area since June 2011. Her father was a Trinidadian immigrant, which gave her the call to pay it forward after law school. Peggy has taught as an adjunct faculty member at Contra Costa College and Drivon School of Law at Humphreys University, has participated in immigration workshops and seminars in the San Francisco Bay Area, and has helped lead “Train the Trainer” workshops for “Know Your Rights” advocates through the National Lawyers Guild. Peggy received her BA and MA degrees from Azusa Pacific University and her JD from John F. Kennedy University School of Law. She has been a member of Tapestry Ministries, Berkeley, since 2008. She is married to saxophonist, composer, and arranger Art Springs and between the two of them, they have six amazing children and three grandchildren who are all geniuses.
Comments