The Lentiest Lent - A Lenten Reflection by Erin Zavala

About 10 years ago, a friend of mine sent me a meme that said, “This is the lentiest Lent that has ever lented in the history of all Lents.” I can’t remember what was going on at the time personally or in the world, but I remember relating to it and thinking, “Yes! It is!” And now, every year, it pops up as one of my Facebook memories, and I laugh and think to myself, “Actually, THIS is the lentiest Lent that has ever lented.” Next year, I will probably say the same thing because friends, let’s get real. This life is not getting easier, and the challenges show no sign of easing up. So, I ask you, what are we going to do about it?

Earlier this year I was talking about where I am in my faith journey with my dear friend Rev. Marilyn Fiddmont. I’m at a crossroads of sorts, and she told me that it was time for me to get uncomfortable. She shared a conversation she had with her nephew who very wisely had told her that people are always wanting to be comfortable but if you want to find truth, move into the discomfort. Truth and growth can be found in the discomfort. I can tell you that a lot of things clicked into place in that moment. Some of it I already knew, and some of it was just beginning to stir within me.

Growing up, Lent was a confusing time for me. I was raised Catholic, and Lent seemed like more of an item on a list that we marked off to secure our place as dutiful servants to the church. Every year, I was asked what I was giving up (candy…always candy), and I would get a pat on the head and usually a, “That’s a hard one. I couldn’t give up candy!” from the adult who was asking and then that would be the end of it. Lent would end, and Easter would come with candy, and it was as if none of it ever really happened. Even as a child though, I could feel that there was more to this season, and as I grew older and learned more, I began to understand what was being asked of me during this time. But even then, that led to more questions. I understood what my Catholic Church was asking me to do during Lent – reflect, repent, prepare, but what is it that God is asking me to do? And are those two aligned? The short answer for me is kind of, sort of, not really, but sometimes.

Moving from the Catholic Church to a Disciples church has changed my approach to Lent. There is less pressure to check those items off the list. I have moved from church-centered expectations to God-centered ones. Quite frankly, there is zero pressure from my church to do anything but that. What’s interesting is that I now have a stronger personal need to go deeper into my reflection time, my amends and forgiveness, and yes, my preparation.

This year has been a lot already. Way too much in fact. In some ways, the practices of Lent began much earlier for me than on March 5 this year. I’m having to rely on my faith and my community to get me through. And now as I move through this calendared time of reflection, repentance, and preparation, I find myself hearing Marilyn whisper to me, “Move into the discomfort.” These words not only allow me to go deep, but they push me to go even deeper. It’s the discomfort that demands that I do the work. Isn’t that what God really wants from us? To grow deeper into our faith and live into it more? To find our truth? For me, yes.

I invite you all to move into your discomfort. Find where God is pushing you in your faith. Find your truth. Let us all grow together. I believe that next year, when that meme comes up as my Facebook memory, I’ll be able to say that last year was definitely the lentiest Lent that has ever lented, and this year we are moving forward, stronger, more whole, and with just enough discomfort to do the work.

---

Erin Zavala works as the Development and Communications Manager for DSF. She has spent most of her professional career working in marketing and media. She is a longtime member of First Christian Church of North Hollywood where she has served in many positions including Board Vice President, Christian Education Council member, Media Services Council Member, and her most favorite as a deacon to her church. She also works as Director of Communications, Marketing, and Development for Higher Education and Leadership Ministries (HELM). She strives for stronger collaborations between all ministries and congregations within the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ). Erin lives in Valencia, CA with her partner Jim, her two children, Lucy and Noah, and her very loved English bulldog, Birdie.